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Only in her dreams.....1

Lin was a very practical girl. If something feels bad then it probably is. She was conflicted by her recent experience with relationships and she was deep in thought when she suddenly bumped into someone right after the corner near the entrance to the library. – “Oh sorry!” – She said looking at the spilled coffee she caused and the perplexed face of a stranger. – “I never watch where I go. So sorry – did some of the coffee get to your clothes?” – She asked looking him over. He took a small sip from what seem to be his last few drops of coffee and smiled at her. – “It’s fine, I do that all the time on my own anyway.” – His boyish smile was endearing. – “Can I…” – She wanted to compensate for what she did by buying him another cup but something clung in her stomach. She knew that guy. It was only yesterday when she was looking at him reading a book in the park. – “Soon.” – He said and quickly left the building.

What was that...? – Her thoughts echoed. She tried to keep calm as she entered the big hall which was her usual studying area of the library. Her heart was racing as she went to the shelves to pick few books and move them to one empty desk. She was tired of this. Every time a boy looks at her she was all shaky and ready to give in to things that are not even happening. Why was she so excited over a guy who acted weird and what’s that soon supposed to even mean? She opened her history book and start reading at a random page just to chase her thoughts of him. Although her best attempts to study it was hard. She kept on trying, reading and took few notes to organize her mind. She was just getting to her good reading pace and she saw a glimpse of him right in front of her. He was sitting on a desk not far from her spot. She gave him a questioning look. He was eating an apple. There were no books in front of him, no bag, no pens or pencils. She wondered what he was doing here – it was obvious that it had nothing to do with the books. He kept staring at her which made her uneasy. She tried to ignore him and go back to her reading but her eyes were soon back at his face. He kept on eating his apple looking right at her with confidence. Was that guy for real?

She closed her book and went to him. – “I’m trying to read over there. I’m sorry but you’re distracting me and what’s with this apple – this is a library, it’s not the canteen!” – He threw what’s left of his apple in the bin and took her hand. – “Come, here…” – He forced her to go after him and went between the shelves. The room was pretty empty at that time of the day. That’s what she loved about it and why she kept coming here to study. He stopped her and pressed her against one of the shelves. – “What are you…?” – He tried to object but he put one finger over her lips. Then he kissed her. The world lost its density and start spinning. Her arms felt weak and she almost lost her balance but his hands were now around her. He lifted her shirt and went down to her navel. He played with it gently and kissed her there. A bolt of pleasure made her gasp as his finger moved to enter her innie. She mooned when it was replaced by his tongue but then something fell to the ground.

It was one of her books. It dropped from her desk. She roused back to consciousness. It was not real. She must have fell asleep for a moment. He was there – she realized it with sudden urge. He was reading at his usual spot. Nothing happened between the shelves a moment ago. It was her mind playing tricks on her with a dream. She eyed him secretly but he stared right back at her. If nothing happened why was he staring? Was he mad about the coffee? She took her book from the ground and opened it. She had to study. She gave him a quick glance only to see that he was back to his book and she did the same.

The rest of the day passed in its usual way. She studied hard, she went back to the dormitory and back to her room. Her roomy was not there. She barely comes to the room lately with her new boyfriend and everything. Lin dropped to her bed and closed her eyes. Drops of tears watered them as she thought how real this dream felt and how much she wanted someone to do just that. She wanted him to do it. She was tired of playing all innocent and be the book worm most of her friends think her to be. She fell asleep with her clothes on.

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