A friend of mine recently came to my office to discuss her proposed new business venture - a massage parlor. Her use of the term 'parlor' intrigued me as generally the term is used to infer that the massage will include hand relief for a man to the point of orgasm (aka a happy ending). I inquired with her if these were the type of massages she was considering and she said they were. I was surprised (although not much really shocks me these days) as her previous business was totally unrelated.
So why would she contemplate such a business? She's an attractive single mother in her early forties. And she's intelligent, articulate, fashionably dressed, very much a lady and lives in a well to do neighborhood. She's definitely not the sort of woman anyone could imagine would consider starting up such a business.
When I posed the question of "why a massage parlor" she told me about her recent experience with yoni massage. I'd only heard the term used once before and was thus fairly ignorant regarding the subject. My attention was snared the moment she started recounting her first yoni massage! Apparently she'd gone for a massage at a parlor that not only offered massages for men by women but also offered massages for women by women and also by men. She elected to have a massage with a man. Whilst the service was advertised as non-sexual the wording suggested the massage was not only therapeutic but also somewhat titillating.
She was asked by her masseur to have a quick shower in the room then lay naked face down on the luxurious massage table. The room was very warm - the lights were low and the music very soft and relaxing. The music was supposed to be calming too however her heart was in overdrive when the masseur entered and proceeded to get naked too. She was grateful that she'd been instructed to lie on her stomach as it enabled her to avoid eye contact with him. She felt nervous, awkward and also a little excited by the naughtiness as this was something very much out of character for her. Even I raised a quizzical eyebrow at this juncture of her story. She explained that the prospect of receiving a nude massage from a stranger hadn't been a fantasy of hers and that all she'd been simply hoping for was a good therapeutic massage. On a whim, when offered the opportunity of a massage from a guy with strong masculine hands, she thought she'd give it a go. She did caveat this remark with insistence that she didn't realise she'd be totally naked and that her masseur would be too.
Her masseur started the massage by placing his hands on her back and asking her to focus on her breathing. He instructed her to calm down, relax and try to let herself to be carried away in the moment of bliss. An hour of abundant pleasure awaited her. He went on to explain that he would give her a full body massage from her toes to her head and everything in between if she wanted that. He didn't pressure her in any way. His hands and voice were both masculine and reassuring. Whilst the allure of his proposal was enticing she wasn't sure about letting him touch her breasts, buttocks or between her legs.
He explained to her that women's vaginas were traditionally worshipped as a part of everyday life in Hindu traditions and that they were revered and respected. He also explained to her that the objective of the massage wasn't for her to orgasm, although it might happen, but the main focus of her yoni massage was to treat her body to a spiritual experience of union after releasing negativity and blockages. She wasn't in anyway spiritual so this didn't really resonate with her however she was willing to stay open minded.
Her masseur also went on to explain to her that a yoni massage was a way for her to learn how to get in touch with her sexuality and sensuality, and to awaken her sexual energy. Note the yoni is often referred to as the outer genitals of a woman's vagina however many yoni practitioners also include the inside of a woman's vagina in their definition of a woman's yoni hence the term yoni often being considered synonymous with the term vagina.
Using warm oil and long strokes with both hands from feet to her head he was able to relax her enough to the point where she could feel her sexual arousal growing by the minute. She found the strong hands across the back of her legs and her buttocks extremely relaxing and also exciting. During the massage he continued to instruct her to breathe deeply and slowly allowing her to drift into a state of ecstatic and pleasurable euphoria. He didn't want her to think about anything other than her own pleasure. And he made it abundantly clear that she was permitted to touch him "anywhere she wanted to" however the massage was for her sole gratification only. His only expectations were that she'd enjoy herself to the point that she'd want to return sometime in the future.
She explained to me that he wasn't very attractive and that he had an average penis size (that she did eventually touch). He also had amazing hands and an extraordinary ability to make her to feel totally at ease. And even though he was a stranger and they were both naked in a locked room he was able to quickly allay any fears she had of him venturing too far. Whilst her boundaries were a little flexible she wasn't prepared to have sex with him (her initial reservations about him touching her erogenous zones soon faded).
Whilst lying on her stomach he put a pillow under her hips. This pushed her ass up and further exposed her yoni. It was 15-20 minutes into the massage that she parted her legs and at that point the tempo changed. He saw this as an invitation to massage her yoni. Whilst using one hand to continue to stroke up and down her body he used the other hand to massage her outer vagina lips and finally her clitoris. He tweaked her clitoris between his fingers, massaged it with her hood over it and then pulled back her hood to get better access to it. When he inserted his pinky into her anus, whilst simultaneously massaging her clitoris, she didn't flinch at all (although later she did ponder whether this was taking it too far). Note that he explained to her after the massage that he never touched her vagina with the same pinky due to the risk of possible infection.
By the time she was asked to turn over she was mesmerized and transfixed with her masseur. She hadn't orgasmed at that stage of the massage but she was on the verge of it. Apparently just as she was about to orgasm he sensed it and backed off the pleasure. Her bountiful love juices were indicative of her rapture and excitement. Geez she had certainly captured my attention with her recital of her yoni massage!
Whilst on her back the massage went very similar to that of the other side except that he placed a warm damp cloth across her eyes to assist her in relaxing. Again he proceeded with both hands to continue the practice of long firm strokes starting from her toes and finishing at her jaw. His oiled up strong hands glided easily across her pubic mound and breasts. Her feet immediately strayed to the edges of the massage table providing him with unfettered and direct access to her vagina. By now she was eagerly awaiting his sensual touch. Within minutes of touching her outer lips and clitoris first wave of orgasms started. She said they just continued unabated for what she thought was forever leaving her bathed in the afterglow of orgasmic bliss. She confided in me that at one stage she nearly cried (she actually shed a few tears).
We discussed the tears. She offered little explanation other than comments of how her ex treated her harshly by dishing out minimal love and affection towards her. For many years the sex with him was rough, unemotional, uninspiring and was often forced. Because of him she lacked self esteem, she didn't feel womanly and she was sexually frustrated. Whilst she wasn't spiritual she did recognize that she was not only sexually repressed but she also yearned for the devotion and passion of a normal loving relationship (her new partner wasn't much better in this department). After doing some research on the topic I have discovered that some sex therapists, yoni practitioners and also those that believe in the powers of tantric massage give credence to the theory that yoni massage can cause an outpouring of emotion primarily due to past traumas (ie. sexual, physical or emotional abuse).
I inquired if her partner knew that she had gone for such a massage. The answer was no. Apparently she didn't think he'd approve. I have no doubt he would not have! I posed the question if she considered it to be cheating to which she responded "not really". I was perplexed as to why she took this view however I did recognize that she appeared to be benefiting from her yoni massage so I tried not to judge her. In her eyes the yoni masseur (she confided in me she'd subsequently visited him a number of times since her first experience – and that the experience and orgasms intensified further each time she visited him) was a welcome respite from the years of abusive and unloving relationships. She hasn't met the masseur outside of the massage room and hasn't interacted with him other than fondling his genitals during the massage. I was encouraged to hear from her that she felt far better about herself now and that she acknowledged that her disposition had changed for the positive.
Her enthusiasm for revisits with the yoni masseur increased on the second visit when she not only experienced many clitoral orgasms but she also had a full body orgasm that he attributed to the stimulation of her g-spot. She had never had a g-spot orgasm before so his assertion was initially hard for her to digest (although she knew it was unique). She was surprised when he pointed out the large wet patch on the towels below her and the excessive fluid around her abdomen and upper things – she'd squirted multiple times in the throes of her g-spot orgasm but hadn't realised it (note she had the cloth across her eyes). Squirting was another first for her!
I'm now of the view that a yoni massage is a lot different compared to the standard erotic massage a man usually gives his partner (given they're much shorter in duration and usually end up with full sex). Whilst I don't necessarily agree with a woman getting a yoni massage outside of her relationship (unless of course it's by mutual consent), I can see how in some circumstances a woman (and her confidantes) could advocate it. I think it'd be far better for men to consider learning about yoni massage and to understand some of its fundamental principles. This would then enable them to perform it on their partner.
My friend is still looking to set up an up-market massage parlor that caters for both men and women and which specializes in yoni massage. I think she could be on a winning idea however I'd be interested to hear your opinion.
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